Indian Weddings

Traditional Indian weddings are generally structured into pre-wedding ceremonies, wedding day ceremonies (consisting of the Baraat, the Varmala and the Phere), and the Vidaai.

Vidaai is when the bride is formally sent to the groom’s household. It can get quite emotional even for the most stonehearted. Many heart-wrenching songs have immortalized this moment when the bride leaves her ‘babul ka ghar’ or father’s house.

An example of the complexity of an Indian wedding can be seen from the various phases of a wedding in the North. The following events take place in a typical Eastern Uttar Pradesh Hindu marriage:

According to Hindu religious texts, Brahma created man from the right shoulder and woman from his left shoulder. A woman is referred to as Vamangi or one who is on the left side. Throughout the marriage ceremony the bride sits on the right side of the groom. That is the place for strangers and acquaintances. Only after the Saptpadi, when the bride and groom have exchanged marital vows, is the wife sealed on the left side of the man.

Bride and groom are told about their duties and responsibilities in married life by priest.These vows direct the couple to a positive path of action. They help in promoting marital happiness for a lifetime.

Vows by the Husband

1) I will consider my wife to be The better half. I will look after her just as I look after myself.

2) Accepting her as in-charge of the my home, I shall plan things in consultation with her.

3) I will never express dissatisfaction about any shortcomings in my wife. If there are any, I will explain them to her lovingly. I will support her in overcoming them.

4) I will always have faith in my wife. I will never look at another woman with wrong intent, nor have an illicit relationship.

5) I will be affectionate and treat my wife like a friend.

6) I'll bring home all my income to my wife. The household expenses will be incurred with her consent. I will always make an effort to ensure her comfort and happiness.

7) I will not find fault or critical my wife before others. We will sort out our differences and mistakes in privacy by ourselves.

8) I will have a courteous and tolerant attitude towards my wife. I will always follow a compromising policy.

9) If my wife is unwell, or is unable to fulfill some of the responsibilities or through some misunderstanding behaves wrongly, I will not withdraw support or refuse to fulfill my responsibilities towards her.

A dowry is presented to the grooms' side. He will state the amount or things he want or needs (some families do not practice this but it is very rare).Dowry in the upper classes is also popular as Trousseau that is given away to the bride to wish her luck and help her settle into her new home using goods of utility, luxury. Electronic items like refrigerators, television and washing machines are given by the bride's parents as part of a ceremony along with clothes, jewelery, shoes and accessories. There is a huge industry around Indian weddings for the privileged and rich who spend money on gifting these items with fanfare and pompous show. In fact, the art of gift packing is called Trousseau Packing.